Throwing Apples

I was excited about something. I had accomplished something — something relatively minor, but very exciting to me. I had run part of the way home. I was a young teenager. I burst into our home and announced my big news to whomever was there. I know my mom was there for sure, and at least one brother.  “Guess what!? I did _______ and got ______!!” ( I’m so proud of myself! Aren’t you happy for me? ) I stood there for what seemed to be a long time. Just beaming, excited. My brother and mom stared. Then, a smile twitched at her face, and she began to giggle. It was a very true giggle. She was trying to hold it back, but something seemed really funny to her. Like if the pastor's fly was down, or if I had a tuft of hair sticking straight up and I didn’t know it. That kind of funny. “What...do you want a medal or something?” She blurted out, and laughted, trying to control herself.  Then my brother laughed. And — I think I laughed along. What other choice did ...

The Pain in Her Eyes 02/19/20 My mom has always struggled with her weight. One day when I was a teen, my dad (trying to encourage her) said, “It’s not about the weight. It’s about health! You should be able to run around the block, no matter what your weight is.” He was trying to help, but — in typical fashion — he was speaking from his head, not his heart, and his words were hurtful. My mom turned to me, and let me see the deep pain in her eyes. I felt for her, and thought for weeks about tactful ways I could tell dad that what he said hurt mom. …but why?… Why did I believe that it was my place to interfere with a marriage, and try to tell one party a message that was non-verbally communicated to me? If she had something to say, why did she flash it to her son, to tell her husband? Why not just find a time/place/way to tell it herself?  Answer? Because she was involved in emotional incest. She laid the groundwork, so far as I can tell, about the time I was...