21 rules of no contact

From the book, "A Christian's Guide to No Contact," by Sister Pitelli:

21 Rules of No Contact

1. No talking to them no matter what happens and no matter what you hear. 
2. No letting them talk to you, No listening to anything they say, No “hearing them out.” 
3. No letting them into your house, on your porch, or on your property- and No going to their house. If it is possible to move, then move, get a P.O. Box, and don’t let them know when or where you’re going. Do not leave a forwarding address at the post office- after the forwarding period is up, any card or letter your abuser sends to you will get returned to him with your forwarding address on it. Instead, contact each of your creditors, friends, and anyone you want to keep in touch with individually and advise them of your new address. Never use your street address. Use your P.O. Box as your address on everything- including your driver’s license, car registration, credit cards, deliveries, bills, etc. This will buy you a couple of years, until they find you online. The best move is more than a day’s drive away. In fact, the further, the better. Another good move is to consult your attorney about putting your new home in a trust or using another way to make sure the deed is not in your name. 
4. No phone calls under any circumstances, and No returning voicemail messages. Change your number to unlisted and unpublished, and do not give it to anyone you can’t trust implicitly not to give it to your abuser. In fact, no one should ever give your address or phone number to anyone else without your permission. If they can’t be trusted not to do this, then you need to cut them off, too. Never pick up the phone. Screen all your calls. Use Caller ID or let voicemail pick up. If you get any strange messages from people you barely know or whom you haven’t heard from in years, do not return their calls unless they told you why they wanted to talk to you when they left their message. Be very wary of anyone who just leaves her name and number and says something along the lines of, “I need to talk to you.” There’s a very high probability that she’s a Flying Monkey, sicced on you by your estranged abuser. 
5. No sending or responding to e-mails. Block their e-mails, IMs, and ability to see when you are online. Block them from viewing your page on any social networking sites you are on. Make sure you use a different, unidentifiable name and e-mail address on any forums or chat groups you belong to. 
6. No meetings to “talk things over” or “work things out.” No communication at all, except through attorneys. Not therapists- attorneys. If you agree to go to counseling with a sociopath/narcissist, I’m betting you’ll live to regret it. 
7. No cards or letters, and No responding to cards or letters. This means No birthday cards, No Christmas cards, No Mother’s Day cards or Father’s Day cards. 
8. No giving gifts and No accepting gifts. If a gift is sent to you, No acknowledging it and No responding. 
9. No exceptions for holidays, birthdays, weddings, or anniversaries. 
10. No returning gifts, cards, or letters. To an abuser, that is a response. He will interpret it to mean that you are still emotionally connected to him, you’re “trying to tell him something” by returning his gift or card, you still care, and if he keeps trying, he can wear you down. Just ignore all communications. 
11. No visits, including hospital visits. 
12. No letting abusers near your kids. If they’re too toxic for you to be around, then they’re too toxic for your children to be around. Monitor your children’s e-mails, computer use and cell phones, changing e-mail accounts and phone numbers if necessary. Warn your children to stay away from them, and to run and tell a teacher if they show up at their school. Notify your children’s school to call you and the police. 
13. No public pleasantries. If you run into them in a public place, ignore them, turn your back, and walk away. Convince yourself that they are complete strangers whom you have never met, and practice the art of looking right past them as if they were a piece of the furniture. If they approach you, walk away. If they follow you, say in a loud voice, “Leave me alone!”, “Stop following me!”, and “Do not talk to me.” If they persist or you believe you are being stalked, call the police. Get a paper trail started. Make a police report and get a case number so that in the future you can get a restraining order or file a lawsuit or criminal charges for stalking, aggravated harassment, trespassing, and any other crimes that the police or your lawyer can think of. 
14. No discussing them with anybody who has contact with them.
15. No speaking at all to anyone who might be pumping you for information or spying on you, and then reporting back to them. Cut off anyone who is not loyal to you. 
16. No listening to any news about them. If you are absolutely dying of curiosity, listen but do not show any undue interest, do not get baited into responding, and do not reveal any information about yourself in return. 
17. No giving other people information about you or your family that they could carry back to your abuser. 
18. No invitations to your big events, and No responding to invitations they send to you. 
19. No responding to news that they are getting married, getting divorced, having a baby, getting a new job, retiring, moving, taking a trip, sick, dying, or dead. 
20. No “big announcements” and No telling them anything about your life. No letting them know that you’re getting married, moving, or having a baby. No letting them know when your children get married, where they live, work, or go to school, or when your grandkids are born. 
21. Yes to printing out e-mails, taping voicemail messages, saving texts, and keeping all cards, letters, and other communications, along with a log of every attempted contact, in a file for future restraining orders and harassment or stalking charges, but do not respond.

Pittelli, Sister Renee. The Christian's Guide to No Contact: How to End Your Relationships With Narcissistic, Psychopathic, and Abusive Family and Friends, and Still be a Good Christian (pp. 1-4). Kindle Edition.