Triggers Cheat-Sheet

Today, I had a positive memory of my parents. 

This triggers me, because it causes me to question:

1. The belief that my entire childhood was pure evil, with no good times at all
2. The belief that my entire childhood was worse than the norm
3. The belief that my entire childhood was dysfunctional
4. The belief that my parents are pure evil, and there is no spark of goodness in them
5. The belief that my parents and my upbringing were so bad that I now need to cut off contact from them

…let us just remember that none of these beliefs are true, nor are they statements that I have made.

1. Thankfully, there were good times in my childhood: especially when I was very young, and especially when my parents were also getting something out of the situation
2. My childhood was, sadly, fairly typical of many children. Perhaps it was even better than many of my classmates.
3. Although dysfunctional, there were parts of my upbringing that were fairly healthy. I learned to work hard, for example, and to excel in school
4. Although very unhealthy, there is still some goodness in my parents
5. I am not cutting off contact now with my parents due to my upbringing, but to protect myself in the present, and to protect my own children, and future generations from influences that I find to be toxic, unhealthy, and dangerous

The reason that I believe that my parents are a threat to myself in the present are:

1. They have threatened legal action
2. They have stalked us on social media, and tried to rewrite memories (gaslighting) that I shared in sermons
3. They have stated that they are gossiping about us
4. They have tried to control me through anger and manipulation my entire adult life
5. I have good reason to believe that my dad is “a creepy guy,” who could warp my children’s view of sex: he may even be capable of peodophelic actions
6. My birth father has used his anger to control me and cause me to “tremble” as an adult
7. My birth mother has used her manipulative tactics to undermine me, sabotage my writing, and destabilize my health/weight loss journey as an adult
8. I have good reason to believe that my birth father would try to “shout me down” on my front step, if he could
9. My gut says that they are a danger to me. I believe that I am my own expert on what is safe and unsafe. I will listen to my gut, and avoid people that I find to be dangerous and unhealthy to myself.