The Magnet (a scene from "Jumper") Jan 13

In the book Jumper, the protagonist is raised by a physically and verbally abusive father. He discovers he has the power to teleport. He escapes, and begins living a wonderful life elsewhere, but keeps returning home for various things. One day, his father leaves him a note...

“I walked down the hall to the kitchen and found the note on the refrigerator. Davy, What do you want? Why don’t you just come home? I promise not to hit you anymore. I’m sorry about that. Sometimes my temper gets the better of me. I wish you wouldn’t keep coming into the house unless you’re coming home for good. It scares me. I might mistake you for a burglar and accidentally shoot you. Just come home, okay? Dad It was held to the refrigerator by a magnet I’d decorated in elementary school, a clay blob in green and blue.”

— Jumper by Steven Gould
http://a.co/fqyAKFt

First impressions:

Note: when I read this section to my wife she said, "That sounds exactly like what your dad would write. The tone and everything!" I couldn't agree more. That's what stuck out to me. The tone, and the hidden messages.

Notice the "love-bombing," and the "hoovering." The message is, "all is well now. You can come home now..."
Also noticed the use of an old memory to manipulate
- Was this clay blob a gift? Reminding (and guilting) about how he used to give his parents gifts
- Was this from very long ago? Forcing Davy to remember the far past, when he was a very young child
- Is this a reminder that the dad still sees him as that little boy...?
- At any rate, such an old, but significant artifact is bound to bring up very old, surprising, poignant memories which take energy to process and are tiring and confusing. Also, they may remind Davy of earlier times, when he was under the control of dad

Second thoughts
- It was not until the next day that I realized that Dad has threatened to kill Davy if he sneaks in again.
- Also, he said it in a way that makes it Davy’s fault if he kills him

Third thoughts
- As I edit this (Feb. 26), I notice that in his apology, there was an explanation. "Sometimes my anger gets the better of me." And who makes him angry? Davy. So it goes like this: 1) you make me angry, 2) I can't control myself (you know that...), and 3) I lash out and hurt you. We all regret that. So really, just don't make me angry, and you won't get hurt. Do you see how he is making it Davy's fault that he gets hurt? This is victim-shaming. It is not a true apology. It is the furthest thing from it.

This reminds me, in fact, of a very old letter. In previous posts, I mentioned the event where my dad yelled at my wife at our first (and only...due to his actions) family gathering. He had promised not to talk about my brother, since it was a contentious issue in the family. "Let's just have one week where we just enjoy each other as a family." He agreed to that. Then, he proceeded to assemble everyone in a room the second night, and begin on a tirade about his soon-to-be ex-daughter-in law. My wife stood up to him, and he yelled at her like a maniac. She walked past him, then stood in our room shaking for several hours, then experienced several "Braxton Hicks". Since she was pregnant, we feared that she could be going into early labour. Fortunately, she did not.

I just came across the e-mail my dad sent to her the next morning. Notice the similarities:

Apology and explanation,

Dear Ishmael and Leamshi,

I'm dying inside.  I've lost a daughter in law, now I'm facing the loss of my grandchildren.

Leamshi, I'm sorry for cutting you off, I should have let you finish what you were saying.

You can't expect me to bear this burdon alone without some angry blow ups.  I am after all, only a human being.

We will be leaving tomorrow.  I want to spend the most time possible with our grandchildren before they are taken away.
 
Dad.